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Witticisms: Sexual Morality

♦ I came across this absolutely fantastic and apt quote about sex and our attitudes towards it by a Norwegian writer. Heck, you all know me enough by now to know I think this way, but it just sums it up so well and I really think it bears repeating. On sexual morality and why it is mostly bull… ♦

People speak of ‘sexual morality,’ but that is a misleading expression. There is no special morality for sex. No matter what you do with yourself, whether you go to bed with girls or with boys, and no matter what it occurs to you to do with them or with yourself, no moral rule applies to that sphere of activity other than the principles that govern every aspect of life: honesty, courage, common humanity, consideration. – Jens Bjørnboe

Review – RodeoH Harness

♦ Disclaimer: I was provided with a free RodeoH Harness by RodeoH in exchange for my honest review. Your Mileage May Vary.

The RodeoH Harness is not the kind of strap-on harness you’ll probably be used to seeing. Instead of a tangle of leather or webbing straps, it looks like an innocuous pair of boypants. Now, I actually like the look of a standard strap harness when it’s done right, don’t get me wrong, but this is something else. It’s a different appeal altogether and I’m certainly damn glad the RodeoH briefs exist. They fill a great niche and look and perform fantastically.

The RodeoH Harness comes in a soft drawstring bag printed with the name RodeoH and some product information. Included in the bag is a metal dog-tag with the word “rodeoH” stamped on it. I know some people don’t really go for the dog-tag, but I loved it. It’s possibly because I think dog-tags are awesome, though.

The iconic RodeoHs, and the ones I own, are black with red accents and a light grey piping, but you can also get them in black and light grey as well as black and dark grey (though those styles don’t go as big as the main style does). The black and red is my favourite, though. I initially thought the piping was white when I saw it online, but it is actually a very light grey, which is great as any possible discolouration will be less obvious. I’m not the best at domestic malarkey.

The RodeH harness is, as I say, basically a pair of boypants with a wide waistband to support the weight of your various cocks. The front of the pants has an O-ring sewn in discreetly to the material, through which you place your dildo. Behind the O-ring is a flap of fabric (red in my version, making for a distinctive look) which keeps the base of the toy from contacting the skin and getting all hot and sticky. Like a little cock pocket.

The harness is made from 95% cotton, 5% spandex, if that means anything to you. Washing instructions are to machine wash cold or handwash for best results (this will keep the colours stronger for longer) and then hang or lay flat to dry.

You pick your size of RodeoH by measuring around your hips and I was between sizes at 51″. I was sent the 52″-55″ harness, their biggest size, but feel I could have actually easily fit the 46″-49″ too simply because of the comfy stretchiness. Handily, if I do need to shrink my RodeoHs at all, I can tumble dry them carefully on medium.

WEARING

Pesky details aside, let’s get down to what the RodeoH harness is like. Firstly, I look hot in my RodeoHs. And I don’t think it’s just me. I’m pretty certain everyone would look hot in these things. They’re sexy but not too revealing and they’re very flattering. What’s more important, for me at least, is that I totally kink for this kind of boypants. Like, ridiculously. Heck, the RodeoH Tumblr is practically porn for me. I mean, look how sexy these things are:

I love the masculine aesthetics of the harness and it just looks fantastic. Not only that, but I really admire the brand image and style too and I think that RodeoHs as a company really seems to be a part of the communities they’re catering for, which is amazing.

So the looks are great, but what’s even more impressive is the feel. The RodeoHs are super comfortable. In fact, when I wear them on their own, I forget I’m actually wearing them. They feel supremely smooth and kind of cool on my vulva too. I feel snug, though they have plenty of leeway for weight loss/gain. I’m quite happy wearing them all day instead of normal knickers and they are just wonderful. That means you can be ready to go any time and you can even pack all day. Honestly, I cannot tell you enough how fantastic these are just to wear.

PACKING

Let’s be honest, this is what these are all about for me. The little “cock pocket” does very well at holding my packing cock and wearing my RodeoHs all day with my packer in was also incredibly comfortable. It was a bit weird at first as obviously the shaft of my packer comes through the hole and then hangs freely on the outside of the RodeoHs instead of being tucked inside pants, but it worked better than I thought. I only occasionally had to deal with the shaft going AWOL and adjusting how you hang is totally natural. If I want to be a bit more “in place”, I can wear a pair of boypants over the harness to keep my package where it should be instead of swinging free.

Very occasionally the top edge of the packer will come out through the O-ring, but there was no way it’d come loose or fall out, so I don’t mind that much. Perhaps a packer with a firmer base would work better, though.

The most important thing about packing with my RodeoHs was that I almost forgot I was packing at all. That’s it, it’s just so natural. When I pack in normal boypants, I can feel the packer stick to me (not fun), I have to worry about slippage and it feels basically like I have something shoved down my trousers. With RodeoHs, it felt like I had a cock. Sure, some kind of cock with no sensation, but I adjusted myself like a man and it hung like a man’s cock and it was just all so normal and natural. I now wouldn’t pack any other way. No going back!

PLAYING

I don’t actually get to use my strap-on harnesses for girlsex or pegging (packing only, sadly), so I can’t give as full a review in this area as other users, but I did of course try out several dildos in the RodeoH harness. The only big downside I found to using these harness-pants is that the O-ring is sewn into the fabric itself and so there’s no way of swapping out O-rings. This means you’re limited as to what dildos you can use with your RodeoHs. RodeoH themselves recommend dildos 5″-6″ long by 1.5″-2″ diameter, which is a pretty decent range that will accommodate many cocks. It can take my Acute, my Adam (as seen above) and my VIP Super Soft among others, but it can’t cope with the width towards the base of my BS Is Nice Basic (Medium). And there’s no way I’m getting the Max in it.

The dildo sits well depending on where you position the waistband of the pants, so it’s somewhat adjustable in position. It’s perhaps not quite as sturdy as a strap-based harness, but then my RodeoHs are a little on the loose side and could be tightened up via careful shrinking if I want them more secure. If you get the right size for you, I’m sure you’ll be impressed with the firmness given by what is basically a clever pair of pants.  Given my RodeoHs are a little loose I actually can access my vagina and clit whilst wearing them, which is handy, but you might not find the same with a tighter pair.

CONCLUSION

The RodeoH Harness is a fantastic addition to the world of strap-on play and packing as well as, I don’t doubt, to the transgender and genderqueer communities. They’re an endlessly stylish pair of masculine-style pants that look incredibly sexy and are also very functional. I love their style and the company itself. I definitely love how smooth and comfortable they are. As I say, I don’t get to used them in play at the moment, but for packing I can barely even think of going without them any more. They have absolutely changed my packing experience.

Before I was limited to using ordinary underwear to hold my cock and I was often afraid of it falling out or going astray in my pants and looking ridiculous. It also wasn’t comfortable, tending to stick to my skin, and it just didn’t feel sexy. It felt like a lump of blah shoved down my knickers. With the RodeoHs I feel secure, stylish and wonderfully masculine. With these I take pride in my cock. It feels natural and comfortable and transforms the whole experience. If you pack, I highly recommend these. And hey, since they’re so, so comfy, they make great boypants too, if a bit expensive for just that!

I highly recommend this harness/packing pants combo, so if you’re keen head over and get a RodeoH Harness from RodeoH themselves right now. And check out their Tumblr while you’re at for some incredibly hot and aesthetic shots. ♦

Review – Tantus VIP Super Soft

♦ Disclaimer: I was provided with a free Tantus VIP Super Soft by SexToysUK in exchange for my honest review. Your Mileage May Vary. Clicking any of the pictures below will take you to the full-sized image.

The VIP Super Soft is a somewhat unusual dildo made by Tantus, one of my favourite manufacturers. It comes in the usual Tantus packaging, which you can read about in any of my other reviews for Tantus products.

It’s a fairly big dildo with balls, six inches long by 1.5 diameter, made out of Tantus’s Super Soft silicone material. This is the stuff that the squishy outer layer of Tantus’s O2 dildos like the Tantus Max is made out of. Unlike the O2 line of products, this dildo is soft silicone all the way through, with no inner core of firmer silicone. As with all Tantus silicone, it is body-safe and sterilisable.

It is really the softest dildo I’ve ever owned and is incredibly squishable compared to a normal silicone or even an O2 silicone dildo. It is softer than an erection but firmer than a soft cock, feeling a bit like a firm semi. It is much more flexible than that, though, as you can bend it in half and even stretch it out and it returns nicely to shape. I do think this is quite a robust dildo for that, but it does seem to be slightly susceptible to dents in the material.

The VIP Super Soft is a realistic-style cock, but in a simplified way. It has balls (stamped with the Tantus logo), a fairly pronounced head and a modelled frenulum, but on the other hand it has a smooth shaft with no veins and there is no real detail on the toy. I think this style is a nice balance between realistic and non-realistic, but I’m not exactly picky when it comes to that.

It’s a dildo which is sold by SexToysUK as being designed for pack and play: that is, to be worn in under your clothes like a packing cock and then to be used as a strap-on cock on a partner without having to switch dildos. Ideally, it should be soft enough to squeeze into your underwear, but hard enough to fuck with. Most dildos are too hard to pack and most packers (like my Mr Limpy) are far too soft to penetrate with, so something in the middle would be perfect.

PACKING

The Tantus VIP Super Soft is, as I mentioned, quite like a semi-erection in terms of firmness, so it gives the wearer quite a bulge in the pants. In fact, it gives more of a bulge than a semi-on would, because the toy is obviously sized as a large fully-erect cock. So the look is not going to be as subtle as a normal packing cock. In fact, it’s a bit like walking around with a constant hard-on, not that I mind that look. In fact, I quite like it. I’m a big girl so I want a big-looking cock to balance me out.

The toy is obviously harness-compatible and sits nice and firmly in a harness due to its adequate balls. It makes for a somewhat droopy cock, again not quite fully erect, but I actually find it quite hard to find cocks that don’t droop quite a bit in the harness, so I wouldn’t say this one was particularly awful for it, despite the soft silicone. In fact, the upwards curve of the VIP Super Soft means it hangs a lot nicer than it otherwise might and looks pretty nice. I do genuinely love to have this dildo sticking out proudly from my fly and looking decently real enough to get my mental erection going.

PLAYING

The material is soft enough to pack, but is it firm enough for play? I remember reading a couple of reviews that left me doubtful of this and had resigned myself to using it as a purely decorative cock, but I was pleasantly surprised. It is actually firm enough for insertion and insertion that does something too! It felt good! The material is, remember, less soft than I expected and I found it felt absolutely fantastic on my g-spot. Now, perhaps my g-spot is slightly hard to find and somewhat easy to please, I’m still learning about what it’s like, so it might not work for you, but it did for me. I found that the curve of the VIP Super Soft’s shaft really helped it rub where it should and it felt great, though it’ll do nothing for you if you like a firm touch there.

So it works for that pretty well. Where it did really fail though is in deeper thrusting and A-spot (anterior fornix) stimulation, as well as at just sitting inside me and being squeezed around. It did nothing for me as something to contract on as it’s too squishy. It’s great shallowly but as soon as it gets deeper, it’s much less easy to feel the toy. And it’s definitely too soft to give me the ooh-pleasure-pain I love so much deep at the back of my vagina. However, because of this, it does mean you can basically go all-out on the thrusting, so if you like to pound super-fast but get caught out by firmness, this might be great for you.

Whether you’ll find this a toy you can actually use or whether it’s just decorative will likely depend on how you feel about material firmness, basically. I think the shape of the VIP Super Soft is great and I doubt many people would disagree with me there, but it’s the soft silicone that will sway you one way or the other. If you like firm to hard toys, don’t get this. If you need pressure or firmness on your g-spot, don’t get this. If you like to whack the depths of your vagina, don’t get this. But, if you like softer materials, I recommend this. If soft g-spot rubbing works for you, I recommend this. If you like to thrust hard but don’t like to be hit hard, I recommend this. It’s all about your preferences, of course, but for mine I love what this toy can do for me, even if it works less well in other areas.

 CONCLUSION

The Tantus VIP Super Soft is a great toy for me. I love the look of it and the feel too. It’s large and fun and squishy, but also does the job of making me come and come well. It is fantastic quality, like every Tantus product, body-safe and sterilisable. It is harness compatible and can be packed, if a little obtrusively. If you want a subtle bulge, perhaps don’t go for this. It stands up well in a harness too, given its material. The toy has a great shape to it and I find it good on my g-spot and for shallow thrusting.

Is it the perfect pack and play dildo? Well, probably not. It’s on the edge of packable and could do with being a bit smaller or somehow just a bit less in your face about being down your pants. You can fuck with it, but it won’t suit everyone and some people are just going to find it too soft and meh. That said, there really aren’t a lot of dildos out there that you can pack and play with. It’s certainly the only one I own. And I love its versatility, even if it’s not perfect, and I love the look and style and squish and use of it. It’s a bit of a Marmite toy, I’d say. I won’t recommend it outright to everyone, but for some out there, especially people like me, this is going to be a fantastic toy for you. If you think you’ll share my enjoyment of the Tantus VIP Super Soft, you can pick it up now at SexToysUK.

The Perils of Packing

♦ Last week I went to the pub wearing my packing cock. I don’t have any packing pants at the moment, though the fantastic RodeoH are working on that (so excited!), so I settled for tucking my Mr Limpy into a pair of boypants.

I added jeans, a shirt and a tie, but I kept the bra and boobs, because cock or not, I like my boobs. And off I went. Here’s a snap of me getting dressed.

It was fantastic. I’m not sure if my friends noticed, but I don’t much care either way. I felt sexy, confident and slightly turned on. I’m not going to do it all the time, but I do like it.

There is one slight problem with packing in pants that don’t have a pouch, though. Going to the toilet. Down come the pants and, if you don’t have a plan, out will fall the packer. Luckily, I had an idea. Pub toilets may have rohypnol in mind rather than the perils of packing, but beggars can’t be choosers! ♦

Toy with me Tuesday

Niagara Fallen

♦ I have a strap-on harness. Two, in fact, though I think one may end up going back to the shop soon as it’s just not as good as the other. Well, technically, three, but one is Vac-u-locked to a phthalatastic Doc Johnson ‘dong’ that I am never going near again. It’s basically waiting on death row for a suitable demise. Fire’d be nice.

Anyway, I have a strap-on harness, or a few, and a goodly number of dildos. Long and fairly thin (like the one below, which is the Tantus Niagara), small and veiny, gorgeous and realistic, neon and slim, curved and chic, flexible and artsy. Heck, with the latest review item I’ve been sent, I even have a fantastic take on the stereotypical massive black one. And all of those have just the right base for putting in a harness.

Crush isn’t into anal or harness stuff, though, so why bother? Well, several reasons actually. Firstly, I originally bought the evil rubber one to experiment with my thoughts around gender. As you may know, I’m into androgyny. I’d love to have a cock of my own to play with and I can even make myself orgasm, in the right mindset, by stroking a cock or strap-on and pretending that I do. A strap-on harness allows me the fun and exploration of make-believe. Plus, it’s great for boinging around and doing the helicopter dick. :P

And besides which, I’m on the lookout for a nice girl to hopefully play with. And oh, how I’d dearly love to fuck a girl with my cock. A real cock would be better, but science continues to fail me, but this would certainly do. I find myself often shifting to a more masculine me around girls, actually. So hopefully if the opportunity arises, my harness will be good for that too.

Until then, I’ll have to stick to strapping one on and hanging out with my wang out. Like so… ♦

Tied Tomboy

♦ I got a bit of praise for my sexy doodles on my Twitter just the other day. Doodles like my devil girl, the housewife and the kinky pairing of a devil woman taking an innocent angel girl to task. So, I thought, hey, I must have some more saucy drawings around here somewhere that I can post.

A little rummaging in my folder found this little gem, drawn during the Fractal Years, as I recall. …

Click for full size and much better quality. Looks a bit grainy like this.

Mmm, yes, please. You can tell you’ve done a good job when you’re turned on by your own drawing!

What more can I say? I love bondage and I love the idea of women in men’s clothing. Tomboys are sexy and crossdressing as a man is even hotter. Not that she’ll be fooling anyone with those breasts but that’s part of the charm. Obvious and voluptuous femininity hidden behind a thin and oh-so-abusable masculine disguise. Fabric drawn taut over breasts, the only thing restraining them. Braces snug over pert nipples. A tie for pulling her lips close.

I love that this particular drawing is an odd but complementary mix of masculine shirt and tie with feminine charms, stockings and heels. A conundrum I’d love to unravel.

With my tongue. ;) ♦

Rock Out With My Cock Out

♦ The bulge in my girl-boxers looked good, I thought to myself as I lay back on the bed. Strangely natural, well sized and beginning to spread a slight tingling where it was touching skin. Crush began to kiss my face and I not-so-subtly moved his hand down to my newly-acquired package. He hesitated and then, overcoming his reservations for my sake, cupped my false cock under his palm, stroking and rubbing as he’d often felt me do to him.

Despite the obvious lack of actual feedback coming from the limp thing stuffed down my knickers, I thrilled to the barely-felt touch. I kissed him back in earnest and rolled myself half on top of him, pressing myself against him. His fingers moved to deftly undo my bra from underneath my short blue summer dress. He plucked it from me and cupped my breasts in his masculine hands.

When he began to roll down my underwear I suggested he leave it on enough to contain my cock and instead cover my bared behind in blows and blushed skin. Quickly he moved to the second drawer and pulled out three implements, the ruler, the leather strap and my favourite, the shiny red paddle. I turned over onto my front and he rained down strikes on my exposed skin, causing me to yelp and wriggle. His other arm pinned me down, leaning his weight on me at the shoulder blades as I gasped. As usual he had to temper himself a little whilst using the ruler and strap, his strength too easily turning into just-too-hard hits. The paddle, though, was perfect. A flatter, broader strike than the stings of the other two. Soon I imagined my cheeks to look as red as the paddle itself and I begged for him to stop, which he did.

Now I needed him inside me.

My thin summer dress was in complete disarray as he rolled me over onto my front and pulled down my pants, setting my packing cock to one side. My breasts had fallen free from their cover, tickled lightly by the breeze. Crush stripped off his top and trousers, his flesh-and-blood cock standing proud between his legs. He parted my legs and began to rub the wonderful thing over the lips of my sex, rubbing deliciously against me. Though moments ago I was enjoying the make-believe male member of mine, now all I wanted was to dive back into reality and have him inside me.

Crush obliged.

I cried out as his frankly huge cock entered me, as always still shocked by the size of it, despite more than a year of practice. I fancied it cleaved me near in two as he placed his hands on my shoulders, pinning me to the bed. As he plunged deeper and deeper I managed to wriggle the tips of my fingers to my clitoris and began to stroke myself. I knew we’d both worked ourselves into a frenzy and that it wouldn’t be long before we both exploded into orgasm. As his cock opened me up to the core I began to moan louder and louder.

Soon he was moaning too and my orgasm flared into life. I bucked against his weight and he began to shudder into me, his cock flooding come into me as my climax faded. He collapsed on top of me and we lay there quietly for a while, his weight on me feeling calming and immensely comfortable. ♦

♦ So, er, for those who haven’t managed to keep up with the above, I’ve bought myself a real feel packing penis, more to come on that later. I’ve wanted one for a while and finally got around to getting one. Also, still with Crush and he’s still gorgeous. Hopefully I can keep this whole back-into-blogging thing up. Much thanks and squee to those who missed me. ♦

Review – Vivid Girls Savanna Harness #1

♦ You should all know by now that I’m a huge fan of androgyny, that I’ve orgasmed in the past by borrowing Fractal’s cock. That I want my own cock, if just for a while, to play with. So, you can imagine that I’ve been wanting a strap-on for a while, really.

The problem is that they’re not exactly beginner’s equipment. There are so many different brands and styles and varieties out there that I didn’t want to pick something without a serious amount of thought. When http://www.vibrator.com asked me to review another of their sex toys, this seemed like an excellent opportunity for a road test. I’ll be doing this review in sections because I don’t want to delay any longer after such a long test period and because there are so many different elements to strap-ons: comfort, solo use, aesthetics, penetration, the harness, the dildo…

So, just bear with me.

Savanna

We chose the Vivid Girls Designer Savanna Harness, for a number of reasons: a well-known brand, Vac-u-lock compatible, fits large waists, looks good and, finally, the Savanna had the most sensibly sized cock of the whole Vivid Girls range. The package arrived discreetly, as always, and I was quite ridiculously excited. Like a little girl at Christmas. Or perhaps not quite a little girl, but you know what I mean. I was so excited to have ‘my cock’.

Assembly and Aesthetics

The strap-on came in number of pieces, with a nice diagram to explain how to put it all together. You’ve got the harness itself, the dildo itself, a baseplate and some powder lubricant. The harness has four straps: two which join around the waist and two which pass between the legs and attach at the back to the first set of straps, jock-strap style. The straps are tightened and attached by pulling them through two metal rings, which works surprisingly well; I haven’t had any unexpected loosening yet.

The harness has a hole in the centre of the front panel, behind which you place the baseplate. The plastic ‘prong’ of the baseplate sticks through and you then attach the dildo to it from the front by inserting the prong into the hole at the base of the dildo. This can be a bit tricky as it tends to stick, especially when trying to take the dildo part off, but that’s what the powder lubricant is for.

It’s easy enough to put on, though because the straps attach at the back you might want to get a glamorous assistant to help you since it’s mildly fiddly. That or a mirror. Once the straps are the right size you can just step out of it rather than detach and re-attach. The harness looks nice too. The whole range is in pretty good colours too (I actually get the impression its the same harness each time): pale blue, pale green, pale purple and….pale pink, but we’ll skip over that. The white one is a nice subtle effect. You can almost forget it’s there to look at it.

The dildo is also aesthetically very pleasant, though the see-through might seem strange to some. I like it. Quite original. And not pink. Comfort-wise, it’s pretty good. The only real problem is that it gets quite sticky when you get quite hot and sweaty, which you can imagine would be happening a lot, and so it sort of sticks to your skin. Perhaps I have the straps slightly too tight or perhaps this kind of thing is quite normal, but either way I don’t really find it a problem. It just means you have to unpeel it from you when you’re done. Some might have a problem with that, but I actually find it mildly fun. Om nom nom, pleasure/pain! ;)

I find the cock doesn’t quite look as perky as I’d like. It droops a bit, tip hanging slightly lower than in the photo above. I’d like a higher pointing ‘erection’, really. More jutting. But it’s a personal choice thing, really.

I suppose the last point I want to make about it without talking about it in use is about the smell. It is very strong. A sickly smell, too. Sweet and quite off-putting. Fractal at the very least had a very hard time tolerating it. He didn’t want to be near it, it travelled far and made the room smell funny and it also made your hands and genitals smell like it after touching them. I don’t know if this is a problem with all strap-ons or even with all strap-ons of this material or whether it would in fact get much better with time or with repeated washing, but it is certainly a bit of a problem in the short -term. Whether it’s an inconvenience or deal-breaker is going to depend, though. Personally I could cope but I really wish I didn’t have to.

All in all, the harness is comfortable, the cock is pleasing, the assembly is easy and the look is good. On the other hand, it reeks to high heaven of the inside of a new plastic pencil case and may stick in the heat. That said, so far, so awesome. It’s possible I’m enchanted merely by the idea of having one, but I don’t think so. To me it seems that the Savanna Harness is a really decent strap-on, at least in terms of look, feel and ease of use. But what about the fun I’ve had using it? How does it feel? Well, for that, you’ll have to wait just a bit…

To be continued… ♦

IMPORTANT: Please read this post for an update to this review and an important message on why jelly sex toys such as this one are potentially harmful and may cause chemical burns.